Oh Lauren...

I do not know if I will survive this "stage" we are in right now with Miss Lauren. I do not know if I will be able to maintain my sanity. Lauren reserves her "best" behavior for Mommy. She screams all day long for me, unless I am walking around with her. This. is. so. frustrating. Nothing works. I have let her cry, and I do let her cry. Every single day. I have 2 other children to take care of- so I make breakfast with her screaming, I make lunch with her screaming, I get shoes on and get people dressed with her screaming.. I get myself ready with her screaming. I myself, feel like screaming. I pick her up, and she instantly stops. Ahh.. yes, people tell me she's just attached, and it' s just a stage... and oh, she just loves her Momma. But I am telling you I am having a hard time... and it really, really, really stresses me out. I don't get to enjoy a 7 month old who plays with toys, or rolls around the room, because she won't do any of those things unless I am sitting next to her.. and even then she is often not content to be on the floor. I am praying right now for sanity, I am praying to make it through each day without flipping out on everyone who try's to talk to me. I love this little girl, I really do... but sometimes...... I keep telling myself to remember Zach, and to look at where he is today. I know there is a light at the end of this tunnel... but the light is hard to see right now.